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Thursday, June 25, 2009

Myth Busting!

Alright, so maybe you are just fine with fighting the fight to get your lap band. And perhaps getting a psych evaluation is something you've been meaning to do for ions. And, maybe you are long overdue for some of those medical tests anyhow. And, let's face it---a little nutritional counseling never hurt anyone. So you are up for all that.
Sure, this whole lap band thing is going to take time. But, maybe you're perfectly okay with spending your extra time doing the pre lap band hoop jumping instead of sitting in front of the TV with a bag of nachos and a vat of gooey cheese dip.
But, maybe, just maybe, you aren't sure if you can deal with taking the time off from work, putting up with the whole recuperation thing and getting your family on board. Possibly, the thought of pain just has you shaking in your shoes. Or, maybe you just can't imagine giving up soda or never drinking anything from a straw ever again. Or, not being able to drink with your meals has you absolutely horrified! Maybe you're just not able to deal with not eating gorgeous bread. Or, maybe--you are like me and you can't imagine--even in your wildest dreams---forgoing those dates with a pound of pasta drenched in velvety sauce and smothered with precorino romano! Maybe it's just all too much to deal with.

You know, I get it. I really, really do.

These were the exact same issues I grappled with. Hell, I didn't just grapple with them--I actually had horrible nightmares about them and I thought about them morning, noon and night. I was actually having serious bouts of real depression over Diet Coke and straws and bread and pasta.
Okay.....step back for a moment here.....reread that last sentence.
Then, read it again. And again. And again. And again. Until you get it---I was actually having serious bouts of real depression over Diet Coke and straws and bread and pasta. Really? I mean...really?
Do. you. hear. how. absurd. that. sounds?

As for the other stuff---I won't lie. I didn't mind taking the time off from work---I figured that I had scheduled it accordingly so that it would not interfere with my busy times. And, since I really felt the surgery would improve my overall life--which included my work life--I was fine with that. As for my family being on board--my father thought it was the best thing I ever came up with and my husband was so damn preoccupied with his own life that he wasn't even sure what the hell I was doing until I got out of bed that morning and left for the hospital (for the record, he did show up a few minutes before the surgery to get the scoop). My son was fine with it as long as he didn't have to see any blood or guts and my daughter just accepted it as something "mommy is doing".
I didn't keep my surgery a secret from anyone. Hell, I told everyone. I sent a few of my dear aunts over the edge when they heard about it but they came around when they found out I had a pretty good chance of surviving the surgery. As for the pain--yeah, there was pain. But there were drugs. So, really--it all worked out. It wasn't like a spa trip, I admit. But, I did sneak in a few pedicures, a few massages and lots of flipping through magazines into my recuperation. And, even during those moments that weren't so great--they weren't that bad and they didn't last that long.

So, if you're wrestling with all those myths--I'm here to tell you that you can quit your belly-aching. You will find yourself having to deal with things that on this end don't sound so great. But, honestly, when you are doing it--you are doing it. Period, that's it. It's almost if nature helps you along. Immediately after the surgery--you really don't want to eat. I mean--think about the last time you had surgery--did you want to eat right afterwards? Same thing. Plus, you're doing mostly fluids for the first week or so. And, believe me--you do not want carbonated drinks! I had a bit of a rough time giving up my all time fav drink--Tangueray and Tonics with double lime. But, once I got acquainted with gin martinis with a twist--problem solved. (And I looked so much better holding that martini glass anyhow!)
As for the straws--well, you are on your own on that one. I can pretty much tell you that I was a straw girl. That took me a little more time. But, eventually, I weaned myself off of straws and soon it was a no-brainer. Being strawless is my new normal. Not drinking while you are eating actually turned out to be pretty easy. I guess I didn't really drink all that much while I ate anyhow (I was tooooo busy eating!). The one thing I didn't give up was sipping good wine with good food. Maybe it's the rebel in me but it just wasn't going to happen. And, it's been working out just fine.
As for my beloved foods--pasta and bread--the foods themselves kind of showed me the way. ask? I said...nature took it's course. Well, nature and my Lapband. The first time you sneak pasta and/or bread and you get that "stuck" feeling....lesson learned. And, if you do it again (which I did!)--you'll be saying Hail Marys in no time. These days I've learned to live without them. I substitute other things. It is very possible. Take it from a girl who not only loved pasta and beautiful bread but could live on pasta and bread alone for the rest of her life and never tire of it.
And, before I forget---I should tell you this---you can screw up and you'll be fine. There are times when you will not follow the rules. Sure, you may "pay" for it but in the end--it will just be a bump in the road. I figure it this way--no one should be going for perfection, we should all be going for doing our best. And, honestly--with this Lapband--you will have help. It's just that simple.
Now, before anyone goes all ballastic on me and says that I'm pushing Lapband as being the only way to lose weight--stop right there. Because here's the thing--I am smart enough to know that it's not for everyone. There are millions of people every single day losing millions of pounds through dieting. I realize that. But what I also realize is that this is what has worked for me. This is what has changed my life. And, I would be a bitchass friend if I didn't share my enthusiasm and excitement and encourage others to consider the possibility that a Lap band can do the same for them.
Bottom line---if you think it's right for you--do it. What have you got to lose? A hundred pounds?
Doesn't sound all that bad now...does it?

Let me hold your hand along the way......please.


AmberL said...

Thank you. I found your blog by googoling the other day for lapband information and I am glad to see these postings that give so much information from a "real" person. I too live in Beechview near Pittsburgh and thought that was neat!(I have an appt with Dr. Collella in July) I would like to know if it usually takes 2 years to lose 100lbs with the band or if it could be shorter. I am not sure if you were slower or wanted to take more time or if that is just the way the band works. Can you post this information and also post the different weight lossses at different points or other things that may have to be considered in it. If there are other banders who read this can they also give their weight loss time frame. I am being married December 2010 and need to lose 150 (prob more) and am thinking about the different surgeries. The band seems the most save and less of a surgery but people are pushing me towards the others because of my situation. I am 23 years old, 5 feet 4 inches and 285-300 weight. I could use some advise. Please post about what you think (I only have a work email and not allowed to use it for this stuff).
This seems like a nice blog.

Anonymous said...

Thanks dear friend I needed this today. You hit the nail right on the head.