BS Countdown.......

Bathing suits. And, bull shit. Don't tell me that normal women can wear some of these bathing suits. Let alone afford them! Come on! I've read all the articles on which bathing suits flatter which body types. Trust me, I've come to grips with my body type. No problem there. And, despite my horror over what they cost, I've come to terms with the sticker shock. Plus, I've spent a great deal of time thinking about bathing suits. And, looking at them. And, trying them on. And, talking about them.....to anyone who would listen. I'm very bathing suit educated at this moment in my life. Yet, I am still bathing suitless. Here's my thing.....I'm all for getting a bathing suit that makes me look 10 lbs lighter. But, once I get that girdle of a thing on.....let's just say the situation arises that I have one too many ice teas or fancy little beach drinks with umbrellas in them. And, let's just say I'm drinking those drinks in a pool bar....sitting on a stool that's in the water. And let's just say that I have to excuse myself to go the ladies' room. Are you seeing the picture emerge here? Me. A wet girdle-type bathing suit. Little stall. Will I ever be able to #1--get the damn thing off? and #2 should I get it off....will I ever get it back on? There I'll be....in a little stall (on the cruise....small bathrooms, I'm sure!) wiggling and jumping up and down and doing a little jig. It just doesn't seem plausible. Will I have to emerge from said stall with another BS......my birthday suit?