Looking forward to those May flowers......

and leaving behind those April showers......

Literally and figuratively.....


Some things are starting to look up with regard to my father's care. I've been working with the Veteran's Administration for close to year now to obtain funding and/or assistance to care for my father. As with anything government related, these things take time, there's lots of red tape and bureaucratic mumbo-jumbo to wade through, there's tons of paperwork and telephone calls and meetings involved and nothing happens very fast. Yesterday, after months of wrangling and paperwork and more paperwork and phone calls and more phone calls, I finally had an audience with someone who could tell me where we are in the process and what needs to happen now. Yes, there's a ways to go and there's a few more mountains to climb but there's light at the end of that tunnel and there's hope that we can and will be able to give my father the care he deserves and allow my sisters and I to live our lives with a little more peace and a little more time to do what we want/need to do.

For the first time in a very long time, this piece of my life is feeling a little brighter....

As you know, due to a series of events and circumstances, we moved my father out of his assisted living facility into my sister's home. What this has meant is that we no longer have 24-hour monitoring for him that we do not have to participate in. Which in turn means that we have to take responsibility for that care. Naturally, a good deal of this falls to my sister since my father lives in her home. However, she is raising a young son, has a business to run and has a life of her own. That's where we come in.
As you can imagine, it's taken quite a bit of shuffling and rescheduling and figuring out how to make sure my father has 24 hour monitoring and care, that my nephew can live the life that he deserves and my sister can keep her business running and her life in tact. Although the past month has not been awful....it's been draining and time consuming for all of us. Thankfully, my father is a delight to be around, he is very aware of the demands we all have with our jobs and families and my sisters and I are very thoughtful and caring with each other. All of that has made it so much easier. But, none of that takes away the reality of what needs to happen each and every moment of each and every day. That's where the Veteran's come in. Because my father is a WWII vet, he is entitled to a pension to help him pay for the care that he needs at this stage of his life. I don't have to tell anyone out there who has cared for aging parents or needed help themselves--care does not come cheaply. This pension was a godsend when we heard about it. Since then, it's been a little bit of a nightmare. But, it looks like we will be waking up from that nightmare within the next few months......something to look forward to.

Not that I wanted to go on and on about all of that but what I did want to do is make a point. The point being that we all have things in our lives that really weigh on us and take up our time and our energy. It's just the way it is. Some days are easier than others. But, these are not the moments that define us. The moments that define us are the times when we get through these burdens or hardships and look back and say...."yes, I lived through that...". That's when we know what we are made of and what we can do and what we can endure and what we can accomplish. And, if nothing else--it gives us the strength and the faith to get through whatever life throws at us next. Because we can be assured that there will always be something else...

Everyone of us can point to something that zaps us each day or makes life feel just a little bit heavier. Maybe it's just me and the people I run with in life but there's not a day that goes by that I don't talk to a friend or get an email from a friend or overhear a discussion about something hard that is going on in their lives. Maybe it's just some problem they are wrestling with on that day or it's a piece of an on-going battle they are trying hard to win. Not-so-perfect lives are everywhere......

And, what does any of that have to do with my weight loss or my Lapband?
Quite a bit, as a matter of fact.
You see, having lost this weight has given me one less problem.....or....should I say.....several less problems--the biggest one being--that I am no longer in a constant state of misery over my weight. And, it's a constant reminder to be thankful to whatever forces I need to be thankful to that whatever was going on in my life when I decided to get my Lapband--I did not let myself get deterred or sidetracked or overwhelmed. Somehow, someway, I forged ahead---in spite of the daily trials of life--and did what I needed to do to get me to this point---115 pounds lighter.
I don't think of the awsomeness of this everyday. But, every once in awhile, when I look back--I realize what an accomplishment it all was. Not the weight loss--that was the result of the accomplishment. The real accomplishment was that I found the strength and the drive and the fortitude to follow through on getting this Lapband and I didn't let anything stop me.
That's why I know that I can and will get through everything else and there is always a good thing waiting at the other end.

So, yeah.....bring on those flowers....