This being a mother thing is hard shit......

First you puke and gain one hundred pounds. Then, you try to push a head through a small opening in your body. When that doesn't work, you beg for a man you hardly know to slit open your stomach. After that, you stay up night after night, trying to reason with someone who doesn't understand basic language or care that you have to get to work in the morning. In moments of sheer madness, you take long midnight drives in hopes of getting a 10 pound crying human being---who is *this* close to ruining your life--to sleep. Hours later, you find yourself a hundred miles away. And you still have to go to work--but you have to go NOW. And when you're almost over the edge, in desperation, you turn to loud, wheeling-dealing with God and obscenity-laced prayers to get you through the torment. Night after night after night. Just when the all night crying and screaming jags stop, you are forced to endure years and years of concerns over what goes into and what comes out of someone who doesn't care what goes in but loves to discuss and showcase what comes out! After that, in your dazed and confused state, you wrestle with curfews and messy bedrooms and socks on the living room floor. Oh but it doesn't stop there. Oh no! Pretty soon, you're staying up late waiting for the front door to open and a living breathing person to walk in, wondering if you should kiss him or smack him across the head when he arrives.
Extra pounds, dirty diapers, missed sleep, snotty noses, scraped knees, lost baseball games and dead hamsters. And it all comes down to this---trying to hold back the tears as you say good bye to the boy with magic eyes..in an apartment with beer posters on the walls.
Now, the only one crying in the night is me.....


Oh how I long for the good old days...........