When eating is no longer an event........

.....a fact of life we have to get used to......

I'm pretty sure I am living my fantasy---I'm not living for the next meal, the next visit to a favorite restaurant or thinking about what I'm going to devour next. It's almost as if food is now just part of cooking or part of a conversation. It's not all about me and eating. It's about me and the non-eating part of food.

Is this heaven?!!!!!

But, you know, right now I feel a little badly about my food-is-not-life attitude. You see, tomorrow is Carmen's and my wedding anniversary. And, what do you do on your anniversary? You start by going to dinner. At least that's what we've been doing for the past 27 years. So, what's the problem? Carmen wants me to be part of the decision of where to go. And, honestly, I do not care. At all. For the past 26 anniversary dinners--I did care. A lot. Right now--as far as I am concerned--if they have wine and can make a good martini, I'm happy. He's all about the restaurant and the food and the wine list and the service and everything that goes along with dining. He can very picky. Getting used to the I-really-don't-give-a-shit-where-we-eat girl that I've become is not going over too well with him. He really wants me to care. He's so used to me being completely immersed in the planning of a celebratory dinner that he's actually offended that I'm not. In fact, he is used to me being demanding when it comes to where we celebrate special occasions. That's what he still wants. He wants that girl back. I am no longer her and I don't want her back. It's becoming a problem.
Maybe I should just fake it.
Perhaps after 27 years, we're at that point in our marriage where we've went our separate ways---when it comes to dining. We are no longer in sync in our dining lives.
Maybe I should suggest we just skip dinner and get on to the rest of the anniversary celebration.....
No, I'm thinking that after 27 years of marriage....he wants dinner...