Did someone say OPEN BAR?

I figured that might get your attention.
It always gets mine....


Now that you are here, grab a stool, we'll order a martini or two.
Probably two.
Because, you know, this bar is set way too high for me.
I need YOU to help me get a little higher so I can reach it....

THE MAINTENANCE BAR
......where nobody knows my name.
You can't lose and you can't gain.
Maintenance is like martinis.....two is not enough but three is too many.

I've never been here before.
This place where I am not trying to lose weight.
Oh, sure I've been to the place where I didn't want to gain any weight.
But, being at a place where you have to do them together is turning out to be harder than I ever imagined.

It's like drinking martinis and line dancing.
I can't seem to do that.
Never could.



I am looking through the bottom of a martini glass.
It's all distorted and wiggly.
You see the life preserver ( lime twist) floating by.
But, you gotta get to the bottom of the glass before you can hang on to it.
And, then....just when you think you can get hold of it.....the room starts to spin.


This morning, the room is spinning.
I am going to put one foot on the floor and say the rosary.
It's the only method I know to remedy what the Maintenance Bar is doing to me.

If you have other ideas to share.....please, tell me about it over a martini.
I'm buying.....