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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

English Lit 101.....

In an unusual twist of events, my husband read an entry in my blog. The reason why I say it’s unusual is that he has a very short attention span. He believes in well written headlines and topic sentences that explain it all. So, I was clearly delighted that the sight of all my prose on the computer screen did not scare him off. It’s not that he is opposed to reading, it’s just that…..well……like I said, he has a short attention span. Most likely, his genius mind works in a whole different way that the rest of us. Or, at the very least,it works in a whole different way than mine. The latter is a proven fact. I’m completely at ease not knowing the balance of my checkbook yet I become completely unglued if someone leaves me a voicemail and says “I have something to tell you, give me a call!”. I NEED TO KNOW NOW. Do not call me and tell you have something to tell me…..just tell me! As for him, he goes by the rule that one should know the exact amount in your checking account and believes that the less information he has to put in his head, the better. A sure sign that opposites attract, I suppose.

Although you would think that I would know better than to ask what he thought of the entry, I did it anyhow. I just had to know. The conversation went like this:

Me: So, what did you think?

Him: Fine

Me: Which one did you read?

Him: About the car.

Me: Which car?

Him: The van

Me: Did you get it?

Him: Yeah, you wrote about the van dying.

Me: No, no, did you get what I was trying to say?

Him: We needed a new car

Me: No, did you understand what the point was?

Him: Yes.

Me: Then, what was I saying?

Him: That we needed a new car

Me: No, I mean, did you get how I was relating that to my life, my surgery, ME?

Him: Huh?

Me: I can’t believe you didn’t get what I was trying to convey!

Him: Huh?

Me: It wasn’t about the car!

Him: That’s what I read.

Me: Didn’t you read it? I thought you said you read it?

Him: I did.

Me: You couldn’t have read it

Him: Okay, I didn’t read it.

Me: Did you read it or didn’t’ you read it?

Him: I thought I did. You shouldn’t write in riddles.

Me: And, you mean to tell me that you read it but you didn’t get what I was talking about? It wasn’t a riddle! It was symbolism!

Him: You said we needed a new car. The van died. Period.

Me: I can’t believe it! I just can’t believe you thought that was all it was about!

Him: That’s what it said. If you meant something else, you should have said it.

Me: That’s it! You just don’t understand me! If you thought that all I was saying is that we needed a new car then you have a lot to learn buster! It was symbolism. Symbolism? Have you ever heard of symbolism? I was talking about the changes in my life. I was talking about how that car and I have both ended an era. And, it was bittersweet. That’s what I was saying. The old van died just as I was emerging as a new person. That’s what I was saying. That’s what my entire blog is about. I’m relating my experiences to the changes in my life. I’m not out there just telling silly stories about my life! It’s all connected. It’s symbolism! I’m relating my experiences and how they connect to my journey. That is what I am talking about! My journey! NOT A CAR! My journey!

Him: Okay

Me: Everything in my blog relates to my journey. I am on a journey.

Him: Good thing we have a new car.


Anonymous said...

Congrats on your loss so far. Your blog is hilarious! Post some pics of you instead of these strangers.
x0x MJ

Anonymous said...

Hi Judi!

Looks like it's business as usual at your house!
I got it 8-)
Great job on your weightloss. Your 'journey' is going well. Good news on THE BOSS too.
Keep truckin'

Anonymous said...

Jud....It is FRUSTRATING trying to communicate with men...I am far from a male basher as you well know...but they are just so into the here and now...NO...they don't get symbolism...they don't get emotional life journeys either...but I do...I understood the van story and it was a wonderful, creative, deep try not to get in a tizzy 'cause I think it's men in general and not just Carmen...can't wait to see you and we can get into some REALLY good across the hallway conversations and I will 'get you'!!