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Thursday, January 23, 2014

It's my PARTY!!!!

Today, I am 55.
Yesterday, I was 54.  
What an interesting thing.....
With the swoop of just 24 hours, I have arrived at a brand new age.  

Remember how I got a Lap band and lost a lot of weight?
Well, if you somehow forgot about that, just visit this 48 year old girl and it will jog your memory.
I mention this tid bit today for two reasons.....
#1....This blog started because of my Lap Band and this blog has been an integral part of my journey to not only lose the weight but to keep it off
#2.....Losing the weight has transformed each and every day....especially my birthDAY!!!  

I am not going to gush and gush about my Lap band.  
It's my birthday and I am going to talk about something else that is near and dear to my heart and my soul:
 And, I'm going to do talk about it without a hint of guilt or embarrassment.
I am now older and wiser and more confident in myself and my passions and I have finally found it in me to acknowledge that the joy that my love of fashion has brought me is a part of me and something that has given me more than I could have ever dreamed....

If truth be told, I was always in love with fashion.   Even during my 200lb+ days, I found joy in looking good through fashion.  So, my weight loss didn't really ignite my love for fashion....
it just set it on fire!!! 
Over the years, I know that many people saw my preoccupation with all things fashion and my love of clothing and shopping as being pretty materialistic and somewhat selfish and possibly even wrong. Listen, I would cut back on groceries if I wanted something that spoke to me.  Was I wrong?  Perhaps in the eyes of some of those folks who didn't care about the same things.  But, for me, it was my art, my way of expressing myself and my way of entering the world.  It was my way of making my days feel brighter and happier....even if they weren't always that way.  Some days, it was all about what I was going to wear.   There were times when the only thing that got me out of bed was the awesome outfit I was going to put on or the chance to focus on something other than the mundane or more painful aspects of life.  What I wear is something I can control.  In a world of things that I cannot was good to have something that I can control.  And, if it makes me look's a win.   A pretty control.....and I lived for it. 
Many times, I found myself embarrassed that I cared so much about dressing well and spending so much energy and resources on accessorizing and styling.   I kept that part of the closet (no pun intended but I find that particular thought very interesting....).  Yet, I'm sure people's hard to hide all the shoes and clothes and accessories and my penchant for styling looks for each day.  It was out there for all to see.    
Everyone got to see just how fabulous I that such a bad thing?   
Fast forward to the present and I am at complete peace with how much fashion has and continues to be a big part of my life.   My weight loss enhanced that feeling.  You see, as such as I know that fashion can be a part of anyone's life no matter how big or how small they are, I didn't quite feel that way about myself.  Losing this weight with the help of my beloved Lap Band has given me the courage to be bold in my fashion choices and to follow my heart when I'm looking for just that right outfit.  And, I can look in the mirror and feel pleased with how that outfit looks on me.  That makes me happy.  Walking into a room and knowing that I feel good about how I look somehow transcends into how I interact with others and how others interact with me.  By dressing well and using fashion as a way of presenting myself, I am telling others that I care---not just about myself but about them too.   At a meeting--my clothing signifies my respect of it's importance.  At a party--it tells the host that I care about being there.  When I am lunching with a friend or having a date night, it conveys how much I care about being with that person.   When I am with my children--it lets them know that I care about how I look for them and I want to be my best for them.  And,I want them to be proud of me and proud of being with me.  The way I do this is through fashion and by taking care of me.
The power is fashion is more powerful than I would have ever imagined.  I now embrace it with pride and joy and pray that I always find myself ensconced in the clothes and the styles and the feelings that I truly love.....

"It's not an overstatement to say that style teaches me over and over again how to live in my skin. It helps me find courage and confidence and control when I feel I have none. While I was drawn to the world of fashion as a little girl because of its sparkle, I love the world of style now because I understand its transformative power."
Stacey expert

And, just as importantly, I am now filled with pride with how fashion has influenced the path of my own daughter's life.   She is now happily living her dream of following a career in fashion.  And, not only that---fashion is her passion.....she lives it each and everyday without a hint of that embarrassment that I felt for so long.   She knows the joy of being our best selves through looking good and feeling good about how we look.  And, she knows that it takes a little extra styling and resources to give us those feelings. And, she truly has an eye for it.  A career in helping others find their style and their fashion is what she was born to do!    It's a good feeling to know that through my example, she has found a place of happiness and success.  And, yes, I take complete credit for it.....

  And, now as I ready myself to step out on this my 55th Birthday......I look forward to styling this body that has been through 55 years of life in a way that honors each and every one of the 220,075 days that I have lived......

Happy Birthday to ME!


laurie said...

Happy Birthday Judi !

Jody V said...

Happy Birthday Judi! Have an absolute fabulous day!

Grandma Bonnie said...

Happy Birthday Judi,
You have given me so much pleasure reading your blog all these years. And yes, you do have a fabulous sense of style and I would like nothing better than to share a bottle of wind or a few martini's in smart outfits! Unlike you, at 270 pounds nothing I wore made me feel fashionable or attractive. Now I love my clothes and don't fear gaining as much as losing too much and needing all new clothes!
Viva the double nickel. Have a wonderful day. I will hoist a vodka martini in your honor.

Darlin1 said...

Happy Birthday!


Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday dear Judi!!
I hope you had a wonderful day, but I am sure you did!!

Jill From NY