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Friday, August 10, 2012

FIVE GOLDEN RINGS!!!!

FIVE BABY!


 Today I am celebrating my  FIFTH BANDIVERSARY!
In honor of this occasion, I am going to share what I consider 5 of the top gifts my Lapband has given me......

....The gift of  REAL SUCCESS.  As any life long dieter knows, dieting can be riddled with failure.  Sure, there are moments of success....we have all had them.  Even so, there is always that lingering  fear that the success is short lived.  The fear itself can derail even the best success.  From the first moments the band met my body, my journey began.   Losing those first pounds was exciting.  But, my past failures held me back from viewing those early pounds as successes.  I could not embrace the feeling that those pounds were lost forever.   As time went on, as I learned live as a Lapbanded person and the pounds were coming off--I believed that I was successful.   The feeling was empowering---it not only put a bounce in my step but it also gave me the courage to believe that I could succeed at losing the weight and keeping it off!   And, it provided me with a baseline to realize that with the right tools, the right attitude and the right support--I could be successful at almost anything.  Except for quantum physics, I suppose. 
  

.....The gift of  TRUE CONFIDENCE.   My constant battle with weight eroded at my confidence.  Sure, I knew I was smart and creative and blessed.   And, I was always outgoing and friendly.  But, deep down inside, I felt self conscious and had that nagging feeling that everyone was judging me on my weight and the fact that I couldn't control it.  Even though my life was always filled with lots of things to do and places to go--there were so many times when I would have preferred to just stay home.  I can't tell you the amount of time I put into thinking about what I was going to wear and wondering if it would fit.  Even going to one of my children's soccer games or dance recitals sent me into a tailspin of how I could mask the fact that I was still battling my weight.  I was a master at diverting attention from how I looked.....I preferred to walk into a room with an amazing tray of food or wearing a spectacular piece of jewelry or a great pair of shoes---just to distract everyone from what I looked like.  I was constantly in awe of anyone who managed to maintain their weight and look good and be healthy. I always felt like the elephant in the room!  My weight loss changed all of that.  The sheer joy of a night out with my friends or my husband or a shopping trip with my daughter is hard to even begin to explain.  Having the confidence to do those things without worrying incessantly about how I look is a gift beyond my wildest dreams.    And, the confidence doesn't stop there--it creeps into every aspect of my life......from my professional interactions to.... well......let's just say....every aspect of my life. 

The gift of  OPEN HEARTEDNESS.   Okay, maybe HEARTEDNESS is not exactly a real word.  But, it's the best way I can describe this gift of becoming a member of a community of people either on a Lapband journey or considering it or about to embark on it.  From the first moment I began to really think seriously about this Lapband thing, I sought out information.  In the beginning--I was just gathering the facts and reading the stories and finding out every damn thing I could about it---on every level--emotionally, physically, spiritually!   Slowly but surely, I found my way to engaging in the community.  Then, came my blog.  Then, came all of my blog friends.  Now, I couldn't imagine my days without my blog or my blog friends (even if some of you don't know I consider you friends....LOL!!!).  As I reflect on what this blog has given me--I realize that it has opened my heart in ways that I never realized was possible.   By writing my blog,  I have explored myself  and my feelings and connected so many of the dots in my life.  And, by reading others blogs, it has given me the opportunity to challenge my thinking and how I view things.  And, through all of that, I have found that my heart is truly open to others and their journeys in more ways than just reading along.  I'm participating in important moments--feeling the joy and the challenges of others while also enriching my own journey.  In the deepest part of my heart, I feel the push to reach out and give back.   I try to find things to write about that will touch people--whether they need a smile or a boost of encouragement or if they just need to find meaning to their own journeys. My heart is filled with happiness that what I am saying in my blog is actually read by others and that the time they spend with me each day might mean something to them.  Reaching out to others, sharing my life and  touching the lives of others is a beautiful thing!    I'm not Mother Teresa but then again....I'm not trying to be....
The gift of GOOD FOOD!  I refuse to each shit food.  Before my Lapband, shit food was as common in my life as good food.  No more.  End of story.  



The gift of SMALLER SIZES.  I am sure you knew I would mention that!  Trust me, I am vain like that.  I'm shallow and self centered and all about the pants.  I'm not going to lie.  I just love not shopping in the plus size department.  I love when my daughter holds up a dress or a shirt in  just a regular store and she shows it to me and says "mom, this will fit you!"    Every time that happens, I feel my heart beat just a little faster.  It's just one of those things.  At the age of 53, I still go ga ga over the latest fashions.  The thrill of knowing I could wear them if I wanted to (and could afford to!) is just a joy beyond joy.   Hello Fall fashions....


So, there you have it, friends.  Five really great things that  my Lapband gave me.  
If you've been reading along since DAY ONE.....you know there are hundreds more......


Thank you all for reading along! 
YOU REALLY ARE THE BEST GIFTS!!
Here's to another 5 GOLDEN YEARS......
Cheers!

6 comments:

Theresa aka Tessie Rose said...

Congratulations! You're such an inspiration to me. I hold you're story close to my heart, we have many similarities....I'm gonna get to goal too, BTW! Here's to many more happy band years!

Lap Band Gal said...

Yay! Congratulations! :)

Debbie said...

Happy Bandiversary my friend !!!

Jacquie said...

Congrats to you and many more to come!

FitBy40 said...

WOW, you are awesome!
Congrats to you.

speck said...

You are just as cute as can be! I loved reading this post. I actually read it in two installments(two days lol) because I was taking in every word.

Thanks for sharing.

Sandra