I am not a follower........

and sometimes I feel bad about that.
But, let me explain.......

In the wonderful world of blogging, we create a community that essentially says I'm your friend, I like what you have to say, I think you are important, etc..... by becoming a follower on blogs of choice. If you have lots of followers--you either have lots of friends or what you are saying appeals to a lot of people or the information you are providing is relevant in one way or another to many people. If you are a blog reader, you'll notice as you hop around from blog to blog that there are varying degrees of interest from one to the next. For instance, one blog may have 1200 followers and another will have 38. Essentially---if logic were to dictate--that would tell you that the blog with 1200 followers is a better blog than the one that only has 38. Right?
Numerically speaking--that would be correct. The blog with 1200 is liked by more people than the blog with 38. Which translates into a feeling that the bloggers themselves are "liked"---popularity-wise--more or less, depending on how many followers they have.
But, we all know that's not really true.
Sometimes it's just the way it goes.
Did you follow me on that?
In other words---the way I look at things, the whole concept of the blog follower idea is that we become followers of the blogs we like and the ones that are written by the bloggers we like. Given that scenario....it would mean that we only become followers in those instances.
More or less.....
Still following me?
Well, it doesn't really matter if I'm making any sense to you or not at this point because what I am about to say next kicks that theory to the curb....
Here is Judiland, I love followers.
I'm a very open-door kinda girl who loves to entertain and welcome people into my world.
I love guests and I just adore making my guests feel good about themselves and happy to be spending some time with me.
And, just as importantly, I get a big kick out of knowing I have an audience and knowing who that audience is.
It makes me happy. Very happy.
Just like the way I do everything in life--big and small--I like thinking that what I'm saying or what I am doing or what I am sharing might mean something to someone in a very personal way. I like the whole reach out and touch thing....
And, I love believing that what I am saying or doing or sharing could possibly change that moment, that hour, that day, that week for them..... or even change their entire life.
As an added cherry on top--I like to know that it is a real possibility....not just a dream.
With followers, you can do that--you can imagine them as you share a story, give some advice, etc.
Thus, the reason why I am all about my followers.
I like that personal connection to people who I care about and who I believe care about me and what I have to offer.
Yep....I LOVE my followers and don't want them to go away!

Given all of that rhetoric---you could then say that I am all about the whole blog followers concept.
Hmmmmm.
So, how is it that I am not a follower on anyone's blogs?
Therein lies the true conundrum I face many, many times each day.
I am NOT a follower on any blogs.
Am I really that unfriendly or am I that self-centered or is it something else that has stopped me from becoming a follower on the many, many blogs that I read?

If you really want to know---I'm coming clean.
It's a confidence thing, friends.
To be more blunt--I don't trust myself--in the hurried lifestyle that I lead--that I could possibly be sure that I would not leave any bloggers out....
I am not confident that I am able to be a follower on every blog that has meant something to me.....
And....
I don't want to hurt anyone.
But, most importantly--I don't want anyone to think that just because I am not a follower on their blog that I don't like them.....
That's why I am going on and on like this!
Say for instance I became a follower of a certain blog and then forgot to do the follower thing on another blog that was just as important to me.....I would feel absolutely horrible not giving both of them their due. And, if one blogger would see that I am a follower on one blog and not their blog....I wouldn't want them thinking I chose one and not the other.
Yeah, yeah, I know....I'm crazy like that.....
But, here's the kicker--since I know how important followers are....because remember...I love my followers--I know that bloggers know who their followers are! So, yeah, I get it.
But....with even with all of that being said---I don't want to upset anyone or hurt anyone.
It's me, not you.
So, I have this rule--I do not follow any blogs in a public way.
In the confines of my little office off of my kitchen, I read lots of them and I try to comment on many of them. And, the ones I read---well....they mean something to me. Not just the blogs but the bloggers themselves. I want you to know that. Really really know that.
I don't follow any as in being a follower.
Let's just say it's a law here in Judiland....

I'm not sure if any of that made any sense but I just had to get that off my chest.