Return to the Beach......

Here's the girl who went to the beach in 2007..........

Here's the girl who went to the beach in 2008.............


Who is the girl that will be going to the beach in 2009?

Stay tuned........!!!

Hey friends....
I'm heading to the beach for 2 solid weeks!!!!
I can't promise I'll blog everyday! After all, there is a beach and the ocean and shopping and lots of wine and beach drinks and sand chairs and hot guys walking in front of my beach chair......to name a few things that might keep me from blogging.....
But, we do have to celebrate my 2 year Bandiversary!!!!
So, let's do it from the beach!!!!

Yep, I'm having a party....and you are all invited!
Let's get this party on ice!

Come on......we're taking this party on the road!!!!! Don't get left behind!!!!!!!
I lost 100 pounds....it's gonna be a BIG party (100 pounds worthy!)

I'll see ya there........


P.S. Let's out give a big shout out to Debbie Dean....it's her 52nd Birthday!!!!
Happy Birthday old pal!

Scenes from Judiland.......

Pictures! Pictures! Pictures!
Did someone ask for pictures?

A few pictures from Toni's Graduation
&
18th Birthday Celebration

The fireplace display! My wonderful sister Denise did the "This is Toni's Life" picture boards! All the surrounding decor was done by my talented nieces--Alexa & Rosa. And, it's also showcasing just a few of the cookie trays.....(we ran out of room on the "cookie table"....a staple of Pittsburgh Italian celebrations!)

Vince & Toni......don't ask me what "Free Jughed" means.....all I know is that Toni hates that shirt and so that's why her brother drove all the way from PhDland just to show up with it on at her party! Brothers!



Toni and her beau Andrew....
Toni and her cutie cuz Rosa....also a new high school grad!! We'll be seeing her at the beach soon!! Rosa is going off to my alma mater in the Fall! Yeah Rosa!
Toni and her long-time BFF Hillary......who is leaving next week for the ivy covered halls of Thiel College!
We'll miss ya Hill! Rock Thiel!

Some pictures from our wonderful "just the 4 of us!" evening spent on the North Shore of Pittsburgh
where we had an amazing and relaxing meal at Hyde Park (thanks to the recommendation of one my most spirited friends--Angela!) and enjoyed strolling along the river admiring Pittsburgh!
It couldn't have been lovelier!

Vince and Toni.....this time Vince is wearing a respectable shirt!
Carmen and I.......as you can see from his belt....this guy is always "on call"! That man needs a vacation!!! Yeah, we're going....if I get all the underwear washed and packed!!!!

Toni and I posing in front our beautiful city----where the water is always blue and the sun is always shining!!!!

Just me.....showing off my shoes!




Yep, there's always a reason to celebrate in Judiland!
(gotta remember that.....)

I'm going to the ends of the earth......

and I'm going to jump off......

(in reality.....I'm going to the beach....)

Yes, it's pre-vacation stress time. I've been so busy sneaking mini cream puffs from the freezer (to ward off the stress) that I haven't even begun to get us all ready. Nothing is packed. Nothing is even thought about. I haven't been able to unearth a bathing suit from my long-ago thinner days. Although, if I continue the clandestine cream puff eating, I might be back in my big girl floatation device swimwear before we even walk out the door.
Yes, I know, I didn't admit to the cream puffs yesterday when I told you about the thumbprints. Maybe that makes them not count.
Yes, I know. I have to stop eating the cream puffs. And those cute little chocolate eclairs too.
Yes, I have been eating those as well. Frozen, of course. Which I think cancels out calories and fat. I think I read that somewhere.
OOOh.....am I back to my fat girl eating behavior?
Alright, so I've made a few faux paux. Eating frozen baked goods is definitely not a classy thing. It doesn't look good with Size 10 pants, a new pedicure and my fun new shade of lip gloss. I get it. But, have you ever tasted a frozen cream puff or bit into a frozen eclair? The mini ones, of course. I mean...really....have you ever tasted them?
Alright, alright. I'm over it. I'm heading straight to the freezer right now and banishing those cute little morsels of goodness from my house. Yes, that's right.....I'm carrying them out to the curb and tossing them into the street. Right in front of where I live. There will be mini cream puffs and little chocolate eclairs scattered about.
Anyone need directions to my house?

The cookies are calling me........

Judi, Judi, look over here....here we are. Open the lid! Hurry! Hurry! Come on girl friend.....



It's those cute little thumbprints my talented cookie-baking sister-in-law made! They seem to know the exact time of the day or night when they could help. For a bunch of cute little cookies--they sure are loud. As a matter of fact---just this morning, as I was lying there in bed fretting over to-do lists and things that need done at the office and empty nesting and being overwhelmed by packing for vacation and not having a bathing suit and needing to get the car inspected, those damn cookies started yapping again. Judi, Judi, we're here for you. Come on Judi. Get up and get some cookies!

And, last night, as I was reading a magazine, waiting up for my newly minted 18 year old daughter, trying to keep my eyes open---those damn cookies coerced me into the kitchen. Come on Judi. Don't you need a little sugar?

Thankfully, it's now all quiet here in Judiland. I had to shut them up. So, I ate them. Those naughty cookies. They got past my Lapband without even a whimper. At least I won't have to deal with all their noise anymore.....

Monday morning came and went......

and I was spent.....!

Blogger was being uncooperative during my typical early morning blogging hour. I was completely exhausted from a weekend of....well....weekending. I was busy trying to get Vince out the door and on the road. I had party rentals to return and my favorite black capris were a little too baggy....which, in hindsight was not such a bad thing. But, I was rendered pantless...which at 5:30 am...is a bad thing. And, to be quite honest---I was just cranky.
Even my chai latte with an energy shot didn't fix me up the way it usually does. As a matter of fact--when I think back on my day---my day felt overcaffienated and I felt underenergized--making my head explode. I guess that's what happens when a new boss comes on the scene and there's lots to do and not enough time to do it. At this point--leaving on Friday for 2 weeks at the beach feels overwhelming. I don't like it when even vacation feels stressful.
I really gotta get a grip. A glass of wine might help too.

So, I'm just going to leave you with these images......

Judi & Debbie--at Debbie's high school graduation party--1975
A 16 year old Judi and a 17 year old Debbie.......

look at Debbie...rocking those 70's aviators!!
don't you just love my hat?????...yes, it diverts the attention from my overplucked eyebrows and frosted overdone eyes!!!
Yes, we were soooooo 70's!!!!!

Debbie & Judi---at Toni's high school graduation party--2009
How old are we here? You do the math......

Finally, we grew up! But, we still manged to stay very stylish! In fact, I'm thinking we look even better!!! Don't ya think?
Hey....as you can see--I'm still lovin' the color RED! I could have used those red earrings from 1975....they would have looked smashing with my 2009 necklace. Gee....I wonder if Debbie remembers where I put them (she seems to remember EVERYTHING else!)!

Thanks to my forever girlfriend--Debbie (a devoted blog reader with the most adorable grand daughter on the planet!) for always being such a great picture taker and for sharing them with me!!!

Hopefully, I'll have more physical and mental energy tomorrow to BLOG!!!!

Now, for that glass of wine........

Will the party ever end?

yes, I'm sure it will........


But, for now....there's remnants of Friday's 18th birthday/Graduation Celebration to deal with as well as gearing up for today's more intimate family dinner at Hyde Park. The dishwasher has been running non stop for the past 24 hours, I'm still boxing up mountains of cookies and packaging up all those leftovers. The dining room table is piled high with who knows what and I still have ice chests filled to the brim. As much as I'd love to say that I am one of those people who manages to regroup and get back to the business at hand after a rather major event--it isn't so. No, no, not at all. Imagine if I would have had the party at our house instead of at this lovely facility overlooking a pristine pool and just think if I wouldn't have had this wonderfully imaginative and super delicious caterer! It wouldn't have been pretty....
Yes, I can say one thing--if I would have done all of the cooking (as is my usual m.o.) and had it here at the house (which is what I usually do), I would be blogging from a hospital bed!! Trust me! Putting on a big party is no easy thing. Even for us seasoned party girls. But, I have tell you--I couldn't have done any of this 100 pounds ago. And, most likely I wouldn't have.....

Yet, I'm not alone in being totally wiped out from Friday's gala....
Yesterday, everyone here nursed their aching and tired bodies while I did some very minor errands, tried to make some sense of the madness that took over the house and worked on figuring out how in the hell I am going to get on with more pressing matters---packing us up for our annual 2 weeks at the beach (we leave on Friday!). Soon....I just gave up, grabbed a pile of pillows, laid down on the couch and joined the rest of my family for some TV bonding time. We were all passed out before 9 pm......

So, I'll get around to posting pictures and sharing more stories from the road as soon as I get to the bottom of my piles of to-do lists.
For now....it's back to the kitchen for me!

There's got to be a morning after......

And, to think....the things I worried about.....
not enough food....
so, where am I going to put all the leftovers?
the weather.......
sunshine and blue skies.....need I say more?

Now, the only problem is......
I'm exhausted.


Until tomorrow.....

She is 18.............

and I am 50......


You know how you do....when your kids are little.....you imagine what the future will be like. And, you figure out things like ages....when she's 5, I'll be 37, when she's 10, I'll be 42....when she's 18, I'll be 50.
Well, she's 18 and I'm 50.

Where did the time go?


Back to getting ready for the party.
We're never too old for a party....

Counting down the hours.......

finishing up all that last minute stuff.....crossing my fingers.....saying a few prayers.....calling on my amazing entourage of friends who pledged their help and taking that leap into......

PARTY TIME!

I am a friend......

As far as friends go....I have to tell you---my luck has been incredible. I can't tell you the joy and comfort and happiness and inspiration and motivation and fun and love and adventure and laughter and confidence and compassion and care and oh the list could go on and on.....my friends bring to my life. There's not a day that is not touched by a friend. I mean, each and every day. Each and every day. It happens. Pretty great....isn't it? Yeah, I think so!
Yet.....
The other day, something occurred to me-- I'm so busy giving enormous thanks for what my friends bring to my life that I often don't stop to think about what my friendship brings to theirs. I guess I have to be reminded. It's not that they don't tell me. In fact, I've got the cards and notes and memories of conversations that do. But, still....even though I always hear sweet, supportive and encouraging words from my friends, I am so spoiled by their constant care that I don't really take in what they are saying. I hear their words and when I hear them...I do get it. But, when it really comes down to it--I don't really hear what my friendship gives to them.

However, this past weekend I really got it. Because it meant something just a little bit more. Why? Because it touched my life in a way that it never did before. It made me think about my daughter....my child.... Toni. And, as we all know...when it touches our children....we get it.

Here's what happened....

At lunch with my dear sweet college roomie friend, Cheri---she gave Toni a graduation card. Inside the card was this message.....

Good luck to you at college! May you find a person who will make your college years memorable and wonderful and who will bring joy to your life forever. That's what happened to me when I met your mother! I hope there's a JC out there for you!

(BTW--JC is me!!!)

Toni read the card and smiled. Then, she handed it to me. Sensing my emotion, Cheri shook her head "you know how it is when you leave home for the first time", directing her comment to me. Yes, I did remember those first few weeks and months. "You need a very special friend," she told Toni. "Your mother was that friend for me." I laughed a little--to hold off the tears. In that very instant, I was overwhelmed with thanks that I was that person for my dear sweet Cheri. I just never knew. It felt so good to know I had given her that great gift.

It brought me back to that moment I met her...at the elevator on the 6th floor of Clyde Hall...as we said good-bye to our parents. Both of us tearing up. We were an unlikely pair. She--in her yellow and white striped top, her worn Levi's and her Sewickley shoes. Me in my just-as-worn Levi's, my red Bruce Springsteen t-shirt and my red, cork platform clogs. She--with her Homecoming Queen blonde beauty looks with a zucchini bread in hand and me with my black eye liner, frosted blue eye shadow and pack of Salems. She wanted a cup of tea and I wanted a joint. Girls who would never be friends. And, yet....we became the best.
I opened a whole new wild world for Cheri and she gave me a world that felt safe. That is what I needed...even though I never knew it. My father often said...."if it wasn't for Cheri...you wouldn't have made it through." He saw her as my saviour from a life of being a wild child. It made me laugh at the time. Yet, I knew, in my heart that I adored Cheri so much that I did work harder to be as good as she. Interestingly...a few years back when I told her that--she laughed at the thought--telling me that she secretly wished she could be more "wild" like me because she knew she had it in her. At that, I reminded her that I saw her wild side a few times. And, that's when she reminded me that the only reason why her "wild side" came out was because she felt safe exploring it with me. I'm not sure if that's good or bad. But, she seemed pretty happy a few years back when I drove 8 hours...trapsed mud across her new white carpet (only because I was so excited to see her) the night before her wedding carrying a red nightie and a few other items in a pretty wrapped box....
I am not sure if we would have ever been friends or not if it wasn't for happenstance. But what I do know is that if it wasn't for our friendship... life would be so different. She would have never known about bongs. I would have never known about yellow roses.

So, on that Sunday in July 2009.....33 years later....2 unlikely friends sat sipping wine (me) and water (her) telling my daughter the many stories of our adventures at college. The G-rated versions, of course.

As I drove home--I found myself praying that Toni finds a friend like me.
A G-rated version, of course.




here's a pix of my dear sweet Cheri and I at lunch.....
(we look exactly the same as we did 30+ years ago!)
and here's Cheri with Toni.
A beautiful site indeed.

Oh, the circle of life and friendship.

Put Mary in the Freezer.......

I need your help......

face her backwards......could you please....

Yes, I know....crazy as it sounds!
But, it works. Ask any Catholic.
If you want good weather...you have to follow the rules.
Put Mary in the freezer....make sure she faces the back of the freezer.
Go and get your Blessed Mother statues and push aside that bag of peas.
You've got fair warning--I need good weather on Friday! (we're hosting Toni's 18th birthday/graduation celebration gala to end all galas)
Here's exactly what I need--not too hot, not too cold....let's say a pleasant 75 degrees, no humidity, no rain.
Did you get that?
I'm counting on you.........!

READY? No. SET? No.

GO?
No. No. No.

I guess "just say no" doesn't work when it comes to Mondays, huh?

I'm not sure about anyplace else on the planet--but weekends in Judiland are not long enough. And, three day weekends are even shorter. Complaining won't get me anywhere. And, honestly, we had an enjoyable and productive weekend. But, seriously, folks.....I could use just a little more weekend and a little less week. Especially this week.
But, I say that every week, don't I?

Well, I guess if I have to do Monday, I might as well jump with both feet.
So, here's the plan---I'm going to close my eyes and take a shot at it.

Hello Monday.....here I come!

I admit it........

I just can't wait to show off!


Today, one of my dearest friends in the world is coming to Judiland. I haven't seen her in a few years. I just can't wait! And, she just can't wait to see me minus 100 pounds.
You know when you've got a real friend when she tells you---I can't wait to see my skinny friend and you can't wait for her to see her skinny friend.
And, gee, it's even better when that skinny friend is----ME!

Another beautiful day here in my little suburban hamlet....

ReBorn In the USA..............

100 pounds lighter......

I hold these truths to be self-evident, that all of us are created equal, that we are endowed by our Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
That pursuit, my friends.....is what my journey is all about.
I have declared my independence from obesity.......

Happy 4th of July!

NEWS FLASH: I eat like a skinny girl!

Finally......

My relationship with food has always been complex. But, I'm sure you already know that. Let's face it, I wouldn't have been declared obese if it wasn't. Looking back at it all--from where I am sitting today--I have to wonder--why in the hell did I eat all that food? Yes, it's a question worth pondering. But, I'm not going to do that today. Why? Well, to be quite honest--I do not want to know. Why I became obese, how I became obese and everything else that goes with it is in my past. It's Judi History. Someday....maybe....I will do some deep soul searching and analysis. But, that ain't happening today friends.

Nope, today I am going to publicly acknowledge and celebrate my new and improved relationship with food. It's a relationship that feels comfortable and rewarding. The best kind! I still LOVE food. That's never changed. But, now I love it differently. As a matter of fact--I might love food now more than I've ever loved it before. And, food is still at the center of many of my thoughts. But, I think about it differently.

For years, I often wondered how some of the most amazing cooks and chefs managed to stay slender and healthy. It always seemed like a contradiction to me. Didn't they eat their own food? Wasn't food at the center of their world? Weren't they always around wonderful, delicious foods? I could understand an overweight chef. But, not a fit and trim chef! You know the old adage--never trust a skinny cook? I truly believed that! It wasn't just a saying to me.....

Arriving at this place is not something I recognize everyday. But, every so often it occurs to me that something very profound has changed inside of me. Although every change can be directly linked back to my Lapband, not every change is physical. This change in my relationship with food has nothing to do with my weight loss--yet it has everything do with it. All of a sudden--I am content....no, I am thrilled....with myself. Don't get me wrong--my life is far from perfect. If it has to be imperfect--I'd much rather it be imperfect at this weight than 100 pounds ago. Yet, it's not about the 100 pounds. In my past life, if I had lost 100 pounds....it would not have signifcantly impacted my relationship with food. I would have still wanted it as much as I did before the 100 pounds. In fact, I would have celebrated the weight loss by eating food. Thus, setting off a course of events that would have put that 100 pounds right back where it came from---my body.

My Lapband has given me a gift that I never knew existed--the feeling of fullness. And, with that gift, I have found a new way of living in a world where I love food. It's no longer about going to a restaurant and ordering my very favorite soup plus a full entree and dessert. It's now about having my very favorite soup....enjoying, savouring it and allowing the reason why I love it so much be the reason why I am eating it.

So....now it's eat what I love and that's it.

What a plan!

July....it's all so real.....

all of it......


We're fresh off of a very overwhelming and information overload Freshmen orientation.

On the work front--my new boss started yesterday.
On the home front--we are hosting a huge bash in 9 days.
And it keeps getting bigger
I have to tell the caterer.
But, what will I say?
I'm not sure if we will have to feed 88 or 200?

My car needs inspected by July 31.
I need my car every damn day until then.
Carmen thinks there has to be a day that I can give it up.
Oh, and, yeah, he ran out of contacts
And I think he is running out of high blood pressure pills.
Oh and yeah, he is definitely running out of those other pills he takes.
He needs appointments ASAP.
He is traveling non stop for the next two weeks.
Did I mention that we are hosting a huge bash in 8 days?
And, by the way, we are leaving for vacation on July 18.
Where's that suitcase?


A two ton bolder is slowly falling from the sky directly towards my head.
I am standing in quick sand.
I can't dodge it.
I just have to stand here.

Do you think because I lost 100 pounds it will crush me faster?
I could use a good crushing.....

Happy July!!!

Mama don't sleep.......

until little girl gets home....

We're in the summer of excuses, excuses, excuses.
And, late nights.
I remember them all too well.
I was young then.
I was 17 going on 18.
Been there, done that.
Now I'm doing it again.
On the other end.
I'm 50. I need my sleep.

Payback is a bitch......

Where have you been...it's 2 am?
I wasn't watching the clock, I was having fun.
Have some mercy, I need my sleep!
Sorry! You didn't have to wait up!
What and go to bed worried sick?
I was fine.
I didn't know that. I thought you were dead somewhere. In a gutter.
You're being crazy!
No, I am being your mother.

Yes, that's my life right now.
Do me a favor...would ya?
In September when I'm bemoaning my empty nesting problem....could you remind me of this?

However, for right now....I'm dragging. But, there's no rest to be had.
We're taking a road trip. To a place where my daughter can stay out all night and I won't know that I have to wait up for her to get home.
Perhaps ignorance is bliss. When it happens.
But, until then, I'm the mother who is sitting on the couch waiting for my daughter to get home.
And, I'm tired.

Yes, I was once 17 going on 18.
It wasn't that long ago.

But, right now, I am a 50 year old mother heading to Freshman orientation wondering how in the hell I got here.....
And, I am tired.

I'll be back in a few days........

Mangia!!!

We've been on the graduation party circuit here in Judiland for about a month now. And, today is no exception. We are celebrating our sweet niece Rosa's high school graduation at a lovely little park not far from our house. Carmen's family from New Jersey will be arriving for the festivities...we haven't seen them in so long. And, Vince is in town as well. So, it's another day of hugging, kissing and eating. Yes, it's graduation Italian-style!


Have another meatball!

What can I bring?

What's a girl to do?


It's that time of the year when the invitations are pouring in for summer parties. Everything from backyard cookouts to fancy-shmancy deck cocktail parties. Time to get down to business fashion-wise as well as food-wise. Because as we know...it's all about fashion and food.

Losing this weight has definitely helped in the fashion department. So, I think I've got my bases covered when it comes to what I'll be wearing through the summer party season. Of course, there's always a little time to shop if I should come up short in the party pants department. But, the food thing is what's giving me agita right now.
You see, my mother taught me to never go empty handed to a party. It's not like she said--"Judi, don't go empty handed." After all, I was just 14 when she passed away. It was the example she set. My mother was a proud Italian cook and felt it was her duty, her privilege and her right to share her God given talents. So, she never went empty handed. No matter if she was going to a funeral, a wedding, a baptism, a holiday dinner or anywhere where a host or hostess would be serving food. Although I don't always carry in a home cooked offering--I still abide by that rule. I am my mother's daughter! This piece of my mother's etiquette code is just one of those things I'm blessed with.

And, possibly cursed with....

After years of not going empty handed, I've made my share of recipes to bring to parties, I've picked up enough wine to fill the Atlantic Ocean and I'm positive that I've single handedly kept my local specialty stores in business. But, sometimes...just sometimes....I'm spent. Not just in dollars and cents but in ideas for what to bring.
That's exactly where I was a few days ago......until another proud Italian cook fell right into my lap.
Please visit her----you will not leave empty handed.

Box Office Bingo!

What movies make you say---BINGO! ??????

It's summer and the living is easy.
Yeah, right....
Alright, so, sometimes it isn't easy.
We all need a mental break from time to time.
What better way to take a mental break than watch a winning movie?
And, what better way to walk away with a smile than to watch a movie that makes you feel like you wanna scream BINGO?
Right?
That's what I'm thinking.....
A feel good movie that covers all the spaces and makes you wanna jump up and shout!
But, even picking out a movie can be stressful.
That's not good....
So, wouldn't it be nice to have a list of recommendations to go to the next time you've decided it was time to release your mind into the big (or small) screen?

What 5 feel-good movies could you see time and time again?
(we're only doing feel-good movies guys....)

Hurry hurry!!!


Here's mine (in no particular order):
-Meet the Parents
-Meet the Faulkers
-Wedding Crashers
-You've Got Mail
-True Lies

Note:
Another time we'll share our fav movies of all time......no matter if they make us laugh or cry or get angry....
For now--we're going for some form of feeling good. (for me--laughter makes me feel good)
Because Summer is for feeling good.....

Myth Busting!

Alright, so maybe you are just fine with fighting the fight to get your lap band. And perhaps getting a psych evaluation is something you've been meaning to do for ions. And, maybe you are long overdue for some of those medical tests anyhow. And, let's face it---a little nutritional counseling never hurt anyone. So you are up for all that.
Sure, this whole lap band thing is going to take time. But, maybe you're perfectly okay with spending your extra time doing the pre lap band hoop jumping instead of sitting in front of the TV with a bag of nachos and a vat of gooey cheese dip.
But, maybe, just maybe, you aren't sure if you can deal with taking the time off from work, putting up with the whole recuperation thing and getting your family on board. Possibly, the thought of pain just has you shaking in your shoes. Or, maybe you just can't imagine giving up soda or never drinking anything from a straw ever again. Or, not being able to drink with your meals has you absolutely horrified! Maybe you're just not able to deal with not eating gorgeous bread. Or, maybe--you are like me and you can't imagine--even in your wildest dreams---forgoing those dates with a pound of pasta drenched in velvety sauce and smothered with precorino romano! Maybe it's just all too much to deal with.

You know, I get it. I really, really do.

These were the exact same issues I grappled with. Hell, I didn't just grapple with them--I actually had horrible nightmares about them and I thought about them morning, noon and night. I was actually having serious bouts of real depression over Diet Coke and straws and bread and pasta.
Okay.....step back for a moment here.....reread that last sentence. Then, read it again. And again. And again. And again. Until you get it---I was actually having serious bouts of real depression over Diet Coke and straws and bread and pasta. Really? I mean...really?
Do. you. hear. how. absurd. that. sounds?

As for the other stuff---I won't lie. I didn't mind taking the time off from work---I figured that I had scheduled it accordingly so that it would not interfere with my busy times. And, since I really felt the surgery would improve my overall life--which included my work life--I was fine with that. As for my family being on board--my father thought it was the best thing I ever came up with and my husband was so damn preoccupied with his own life that he wasn't even sure what the hell I was doing until I got out of bed that morning and left for the hospital (for the record, he did show up a few minutes before the surgery to get the scoop). My son was fine with it as long as he didn't have to see any blood or guts and my daughter just accepted it as something "mommy is doing".
I didn't keep my surgery a secret from anyone. Hell, I told everyone. I sent a few of my dear aunts over the edge when they heard about it but they came around when they found out I had a pretty good chance of surviving the surgery. As for the pain--yeah, there was pain. But there were drugs. So, really--it all worked out. It wasn't like a spa trip, I admit. But, I did sneak in a few pedicures, a few massages and lots of flipping through magazines into my recuperation. And, even during those moments that weren't so great--they weren't that bad and they didn't last that long.

So, if you're wrestling with all those myths--I'm here to tell you that you can quit your belly-aching. You will find yourself having to deal with things that on this end don't sound so great. But, honestly, when you are doing it--you are doing it. Period, that's it. It's almost if nature helps you along. Immediately after the surgery--you really don't want to eat. I mean--think about the last time you had surgery--did you want to eat right afterwards? Same thing. Plus, you're doing mostly fluids for the first week or so. And, believe me--you do not want carbonated drinks! I had a bit of a rough time giving up my all time fav drink--Tangueray and Tonics with double lime. But, once I got acquainted with gin martinis with a twist--problem solved. (And I looked so much better holding that martini glass anyhow!)
As for the straws--well, you are on your own on that one. I can pretty much tell you that I was a straw girl. That took me a little more time. But, eventually, I weaned myself off of straws and soon it was a no-brainer. Being strawless is my new normal. Not drinking while you are eating actually turned out to be pretty easy. I guess I didn't really drink all that much while I ate anyhow (I was tooooo busy eating!). The one thing I didn't give up was sipping good wine with good food. Maybe it's the rebel in me but it just wasn't going to happen. And, it's been working out just fine.
As for my beloved foods--pasta and bread--the foods themselves kind of showed me the way. How..you ask? Well...like I said...nature took it's course. Well, nature and my Lapband. The first time you sneak pasta and/or bread and you get that "stuck" feeling....lesson learned. And, if you do it again (which I did!)--you'll be saying Hail Marys in no time. These days I've learned to live without them. I substitute other things. It is very possible. Take it from a girl who not only loved pasta and beautiful bread but could live on pasta and bread alone for the rest of her life and never tire of it.
And, before I forget---I should tell you this---you can screw up and you'll be fine. There are times when you will not follow the rules. Sure, you may "pay" for it but in the end--it will just be a bump in the road. I figure it this way--no one should be going for perfection, we should all be going for doing our best. And, honestly--with this Lapband--you will have help. It's just that simple.
Now, before anyone goes all ballastic on me and says that I'm pushing Lapband as being the only way to lose weight--stop right there. Because here's the thing--I am smart enough to know that it's not for everyone. There are millions of people every single day losing millions of pounds through dieting. I realize that. But what I also realize is that this is what has worked for me. This is what has changed my life. And, I would be a bitchass friend if I didn't share my enthusiasm and excitement and encourage others to consider the possibility that a Lap band can do the same for them.
Bottom line---if you think it's right for you--do it. What have you got to lose? A hundred pounds?
Doesn't sound all that bad now...does it?


Let me hold your hand along the way......please.

Here's what you gotta do......

If you want a Lapband of your very own.......
I am going to give it to you straight.....

(This is so very exciting! I have been overwhelmed with emails and even a few phone calls after my post yesterday. Looks like there are lots of you who want to join the Lapband family. The more the merrier! )

Instead of emailing everyone individually (which I started to do!), I figured I'd put it all out here on my blog. For those already banded folks out there in blogland--please feel free to add any other details, points of interest or advice in the comment section!

From my experience....here's what I think you need to know to get started....

1. You have to be obese....if you are not sure if you are obese....check here.
2. If you are not obese. but you are at an unhealthy weight...you will need to have 2 co-morbidities (high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes or pre-dieabetes)
3. You have tried many many many times to lose weight and you are still obese
4. If you don't fall into any of those categories but you still feel like you really need to lose weight to improve your quality of life and you have the cash upfront--there's lots of very highly regarded clinics in Mexico that will do it.....check here for the info
5. Once you have determined that you really do want to explore having a Lapband---go directly to your PCP and discuss it.
6. Even if your doctor is not on board with what you want to do, it's okay! Check here for surgeons in your area who preform the surgery.
7. Check out LapBandTalk.com for state-by-state recommendations on surgeons. And, spend a little time checking out the entire forum--it's chalk full of Lap Band patients who are at various stages of the process. This is an excellent place to hang out and get to know people and find out first hand info on what they are going through and how they are doing! It was a lifesaver for me many times! I met some great, great people there who I now call friends!
8. Most of the time--insurance does cover the cost of the surgery. But, if you want to make sure--call your insurance provider and find out! And, if it's not covered---try to see what you can do to get it covered! LapbandTalk.com has an entire forum for that! Use it!
9. Make an an appointment with a surgeon. Before you go---put together a list of all of the weight loss measures you have tried during your life time. And, be sure to put the results next to it. If you worked with a doctor or have any receipts from programs you joined or anything that would document your struggle--gather it all together. When you go to see the surgeon--you will be armed with all evidence! I had an entire notebook filled with documentation!!! But, even if you don't have that--don't worry! The proof will be at the scale!
10. Don't be surprised if the surgeon first wants you to go on a medically supervised diet to see how you do. Do what you want with this--you can either make it work or not make it work. Just remember--if you lose too much weight---you may not qualify for the surgery! Just thought I'd mention that....
11. Once you talk to the surgeon--do not get discouraged by what you hear! The process can sometimes feel mind numbing--a psych evaluation, several standard medical tests, nutritional counseling, etc. But, it will all go fast. Just do it!!!
12. Do not lose hope as time ticks on! Just think about the fact that you are working towards something positive!!!
13. And, most importantly--do not lose hope if things don't go as perfectly as planned. Keep going back to Lapbandtalk.com and see who else is going through what you are going through. I guarantee you---you will not be alone. And, there will be solutions offered for whatever issue you are grappling with!!! I promise.
14. Make sure you use every resource your surgeon has to offer. Go to the seminars. Go to the support groups. Make it a priority--even if it takes 6 months!! Believe that it will happen!
15. Stay in touch with your surgeon's office. Make sure to keep them up to date on where you are and what you need to do. Push to get a date scheduled if you have to! Once you do all the work that is required--you will find yourself filled with excited anticipation! Trust me on that!

And, if you find yourself in need of a little bit of Judi in Lapband Land----be sure to check in the archives of my blog.....there's lots of information and inspiration tucked inside my Stories from the Road....


And, most of all--- good luck!


Email me your questions or post them in the comment section!

Are you considering Lapband?

Now that I have dubbed myself as a Lapband success story---losing this 100 lbs and all---I've been wondering how I can "pay it forward". And, hopefully, in the process--keep myself focused on my own journey. Now that I've lost the weight--I need some way to keep the motivation going! You know that's what I've been worrying so much about.

So, it got me to thinking-- what can I offer to anyone who might be *this* close to thinking about getting getting a Lapband (but may be having doubts, concerns or fears)? How can I help them? One thought led to another and all of a sudden--I thought about all those silent people who read my blog. Are there people reading this blog right now who came here because they want to get some Lapband help? Could I be the catalyst to get them to where they want to be? Or, am I just shooting blanks.....? Or, am I just getting entirely too big headed here?

Are you the reader I am talking to?

Sure, there's lots of places to go for Lapband help---I know. I've been there--to every nook and cranny of the internet, to every blessed support group meeting and to the millions of articles out there devoted to it. I poured over them---soaking up every morsel of information, every piece of data and getting to know every single rule. Even with all of that--it didn't make me an expert. But it did make me a believer. After all of my research, I was 100% convinced that Lapbanding was the most practical solution for obese people like me who don't want to endure the more invasive surgeries, who have had problems with portion control and dieting in the past and who need a life-long solution to weight management. But, even with all of that reading and talking and learning---the best evidence that my Lapband was my saving grace has been my journey itself. Losing this weight could not have happened without it. And, finding the person who I really want to be--although I am still a work in progress--could have never happened without spending these past 22 months Lapbanding. It's worked. I have not had any negative, lasting side effects or life-threatening problems. I feel healthier and more alive than I have in more than a decade.

All the good vibes and happy results happened because I took a leap of faith and got a Lapband. The thought that my days of hokey diets and deprivation are over brings me a peace that I have never known. Not having those excess pounds as my daily baggage has been a true gift. And, as Hallmarky as this sounds---it's a gift I want others to experience. It's THAT GOOD.

So---to you readers and friends out there who may be thinking about getting a Lapband--do not fight that thought. Do not run and hide. And, do not spend another day not taking charge of your weight loss issues, your health, your mind and your body. Do I sound like a walking advertisement? If so, I am sorry. But, I honestly want everyone to feel as good as I do!

Wanna talk Lapband?
I invite you to email me (from my profile page).
We'll talk.

Sushi, sushi....where have you been all of my life?

I HEART sushi......who knew?

All of a sudden--Judi is madly and passionately in love with sushi.
I feel so Hollywood. And trendy.
Do you want to go out for sushi? I can really say that now.
And, if someone asks me to go out for sushi-- I can say "why yes, of course, I adore sushi!"

And, I owe it all to my Lapband.
My Lapband allows me be more adventuresome with my eating. Here's why--in my past life--the life where I knew nothing about sushi--if I was at a party where they had a huge buffet of my favorite foods as well as a Sushi Bar--you can bet your bottom dollar that I'd be piling on that buffet food and not even looking at the sushi. I mean--in my mind--I did not like sushi. I never tasted it but that didn't really matter. I had pasta and chicken and sausage dripping with peppers and onions and a huge beautiful sandwich to satisfy my pallette. Who needed sushi? What the hell was sushi anyway?

But now--that buffet table does not entice me the way it once did. Which gives me more time to explore other things---and in the case of the party we went to last night--it gave me the opportunity to get to know sushi. And I am telling you what--it is a culinary delight that I am so glad I didn't miss. If I didn't have my Lapband--I would have stood in that long line with every other middle aged person there and we'd be talking about retirement accounts and arthritis while happily piling food on our plates. Instead, I got to experience a brand new taste sensation while standing with all the sushi lovers--the young, hip, trendy, fit girls and guys. Talking sushi....


Did I ever tell you that I love my Lapband?
And, I looooove sushi.

Have I ever told you about my father?

Yes, I'm sure I have.

He's a character, that man. No wonder I blog about him, talk about him, think about him, laugh about him and share him with the world through my stories.
There's no end to the Frank Carr tales I can come up with. And, when I think about that fact--it makes me smile. Why? Because it's then that I realize that I take after my father. I was raised on stories about all the characters in his life--Tommy Kirk, Jimmy Callahan, Billy O'Rourke, Old Duffy, Mrs. Cavanaugh, Father O'Malley, Brother McGinty, Charlie Joyce, Tommy-two-eyes, Buster Beans, Jacky Kirk, Morris Balder, and lest I forget--his brother Patsy, his father Charlie and his mother Mary Birtha. I knew them so well. I could tell them to you. And, maybe I will.

Most of those characters from my father's stories are long gone. Yet, they live forever...through the tales shared by my father.

Yes, I am my father's daughter--blessed with a father who gave me pieces of life worth sharing and the gift of gab to bring it all to life---over and over again. After all these years I finally have it figured out----it's not just idle chatter filling up time. Words are a precious gift. They spin the stories of our lives and keep everyone in them alive forever and ever.......
It's time to get ready to spend this Fathers' Day with my father.
I pray that I will hear one of his wonderous stories. Again.

Hello Summer........

Meet Judi.
She likes Margaritas.
She lost 100 pounds.
She is happy to be here.

Now, can we have a little chat about this weather?
Can we stop the rain and the thunder?
and......could you get some sunshine for Judiland?
You see, she wants to wear her summer clothes and shoes.....
And maybe even her bathing suit....!
And she wants to drink Margaritas.
Cause when a girl loses 100 pounds, she needs to do these kinds of things.....


Damn Right!

What a week.......

in Judiland!

All kinds of headaches made their way into my corner of the world. One of them in particular has managed to derail some of my plans for tonight--which makes me oh so sad. Remember that headache I've been bitching about? Yeah, that one. Well, it reached epic proportions! And now it's made history---it's the first time in my entire life that I have had to cancel a night out on the town with my spirited friends. Yes, it's a fucking historical moment here in Judiland......

The good news is that I don't have The Swine Flu. The bad news is that what I do have is what the nurse practitioner termed as "a nasty, nasty, nasty strain of a virus that has been hitting everyone hard!". The terrible news is that the only thing I can do to combat it is take Tylenol and rest. And, even worse than that is that she said it's been sticking around for 7-10 days with most people. Yeah, I'm not happy.....

In addition to all of that---we were hit with a nasty storm. Even a few tornadoes were sited. Causing all kinds of headaches! And, it happened right in the middle of my sickness! There I was---laying on the couch in the same position I've assumed all week after work---curled up under a blanket, sedated by Tylenol, wearing the same exact outfit I wore to work--shoes and all. And, I never moved. Even when I heard a swift wind outside and even when all hell broke loose! I stayed under my blanket wishing that my house would pick up from it's foundation--ala Wizard of Oz (my all time hated movie!). I wanted to be transported somewhere---anywhere but there. At that point, I would have gladly hung out with the Tin Man and the Lion dude if I could have only been rid of that headache....

A wicked storm came through my little suburban hamlet--with winds so fierce they came through an open window in the kitchen and took down 3 pictures off their wall hangers--smashing them right to the ground! Yeah, I didn't bother to get up. Lightning bounced around the house---I could see it dancing right outside the windows. I just stayed put. The lights were flickering off and on and the noise from outside was deafening. I didn't care. The dining room doors to the deck blew open wide and all the papers that were sitting on the table blew around the room--some of them blowing right out the door. Oh well, I guess they're gone.

I suppose it wasn't all bad......

Thankfully, I wasn't washed away by flood waters or stranded in my car in the middle of Oakland with my car stalled out and water pouring through the doors!
Below are scenes from the road that I travel home from the office---I passed through this area shortly before these pictures were taken.
God knows what would have happened if I would have found myself in this situation---unable to get to my couch. With my headache and all. Trust me.....it would have made the news. The national news.



When the best part of the week is that you weren't stuck in a flood.......WTF?


Bring on the weekend.....

It's all a state of mind.....

right?







Within hours of developing the symptoms that I told you about yesterday, Vince called to report that he was feeling rather nasty---headache, achy, chills and fever. Just like me. Mine seem to be squelched with regular doses of Tylenol, I told him--advising him to get himself a nice big bottle. Since he had been home over the weekend--I figured we both caught the same bug.

Then, a little while later-- I received an email from our campus health office with an update on Influenza A (H1N1)....better known as The Swine Flu. It appears that there have been 2 reported influenza cases on our campus--the exact type will not be known until the blood work comes back from the lab. Although there did not seem to be any need for alarm--we were advised to seek medical attention if we had any of the symptoms listed.
All of a sudden, I found myself getting sicker.

Knowing that Vince studies and works on a much larger campus a few hours away, I decided to do a little research about any reported cases there. It seems as though there have been a few reported influenza cases--nothing has been confirmed as the dreaded type--again, still waiting on results. Once again, the information I read said that anyone having the symptoms listed should seek medical attention.
I felt even more sick.

Then, a little while later--my sister called to see how I was feeling. During the course of that conversation--she told me about a customer of hers whose husband was feeling poorly and went to a local express medical facility. Upon hearing his symptoms, he was sent immediately to the local hospital for testing. She told me of his symptoms.
And the sicker I got.

Yesterday I joked about The Swine Flu. Today it ain't no joke.....
But, I feel so silly. I mean, I'm not sick-sick-sick. I have these bouts of flu symptoms, a lack of energy, a sorta sore throat, some nausea.....nothing so awful that I can't function--well, as long as I take 3 Tylenol every 4 hours. And, that's exactly the way Vince feels. It's like this sorta-sick- but-not-really-sick-but-you-feel-like-shit flu. Yeah, that's what I have....
I don't have The Swine Flu....

Or.....do I?

Is it the cooties? The swine flu? A case of summeritis?

or maybe it's just the effects of my world gone mad.........


I'm just not feeling Judi-like. I'm sporting a come-and-go fever, dealing with off-and-on chills and battling all-over-aches. I've got a big time headache----everywhere. Even in my face! Ever heard that joke---is your face hurting? Well, this ain't no joke---it's killing me! Popping a few Tylenol does the trick for a little while. Once they wear off....I'm back to this godawful, pissy, miserable, unwelcome unJudi-like feeling.
Do I have some kind of mysterious infection? If so--I've got 2 words for it--FUCK OFF! I've got a loooong week of work, chores, tasks and deadlines to attend to and of course, I have my everyday variety of crisis management things to deal with. But, the biggest thing is---I've got a few parties going on--beginning at 6p m Friday and rolling right into Sunday night. This just ain't the time for feeling not-so-great.
So....Mr. Infection (I know infections are male beings.....)......get the hell out of Judiland.

Life is a rollercoaster, a merry-go-round, a tilt-a-whirl,, a waterslide, a shooting range.....

Yep, it's just one big amusement park and I'm living in the Penny Arcade......

Monday morning....you sure look fine.....

Hi all....I apologize but I'm having a tough time with blogger this morning posting this.
So....I hope it posts and I sure hope it doesn't drive you as crazy as it's driving me.
Yeah, it's MONDAY!


















































































sing it with Fleetwood Mac and me!............
Friday I got travelin' on my mind
First you love me, and then you fade away
I can't go on believin' this way
I got nothing but love for you
So tell me what you really want to do
First you love me, then you get on down the line
But I don't mind
I don't mind
I'll be there if you want me to
No one else that could ever do
Got to get some peace in my mind

Monday morning you sure look fine
Friday I got travellin' on my mind
First you love me, and then you say it's wrong
You know, I can't go on believing for long
But you know it's true, yes
You only want me when I get over you
First you love me, then you get on down the line
But I don't mind
No, I don't mind, yeah
I'll be there if you want me to
No one else that could ever do
Got to get some peace in my mind

But you know it's true
You know, you only want me when I get over you
First you love me, then you get on down the line
But I don't mind
No, I don't mind, yeah
I'll be there if you want me to
No one else that could ever do
Got to get some peace in my mind

yes, it's Monday once more!!!!!!!

Take Me Out to the Ballgame......

Yesterday was my dearly beloved Mother's 90th birthday. Her name was Antoinette DiPippa Carr. They called her Din. She died at the age of 53. I was 14. Both of us way too young. I'm not sure what she would have done to celebrate the day but I can guarantee you that my sisters and I would have made it special. We would have had lemon meringue pie and maybe shared a high ball or two. Those were some of her favorite things.

When I woke up to the sunshine yesterday morning--I thought--maybe we would have taken my mother to a Pirate game for her 90th birthday. Pie, booze and baseball---what a nice dream. Instead, my sister and I spent the afternoon at a family baby shower--seated at a table with one of my mother's best friends--her sister-in-law--our Aunt Mary and my mother's goddaughter--my cousin Annette. We were there to honor Annette's son's (my godson) wife.

Aunt Mary--now frail and tiny, attached to an oxygen machine--sat and nibbled on cookies as she pondered the passing of time. "She would have been 90," she said a few times---not speaking to anyone in particular---as if she was trying to figure it all out. Annette just shook her head in sad agreement....adding " I miss my dad everyday." Annette's dad--my mother's baby brother--our Uncle Anthony--suddenly died under his grape arbor last summer at the age of 81.

Upon hearing Annette mention her dad--my mind drifted back to my thought that morning--baseball. My Uncle Anthony was a baseball fanatic. He wore a radio earplug in his ear from April to October every year. Listening to Pirates baseball. That's the way I always remember him. He and his older brother Sammy were both standout ball players in their younger days---playing for various teams in and around the Pittsburgh area--mostly in the Hill District where they grew up. I suppose that's how my mother came to love baseball----watching her brothers play.

Yes, my mother loved baseball. In her own special, Din-way way. She would put the statue of St. Jude (patron saint of the hopeless) on top of our TV set during especially important games. She especially loved Roberto Clemente and took it especially hard when he was killed in a plane crash only a few months before her own death. When the Pirates won the World Series in 1971, she wanted to party! My dad even took her to see a few play off games in his company box during that series. She felt so special and queen-like going to such an event, sitting in such a luxurious place. After they won the title, she got my dad to take us all downtown in our Comet station wagon to join all the revelers! My mom and dad were buying beers and cocktails out the window from bartenders who were taking orders in the street and they were hollering and singing with all the other partiers packed into downtown Pittsburgh. It's a memory I will never forget. It was one of a handfull of times that I got a glimpse into the woman inside my mother---that fun girl with a hint of naughtiness and a little bit of sass .

The Pirates won last night---9 to 3. They don't do that much these days. My mother must have been at the game--seated right next to her brothers. Celebrating her 90th birthday.
I wish I could have been there.....


Keep baseball alive in the hearts of young baseball lovers.....please go to this link and vote for my friend Rebecca's cousin.....
http://baseballyouth.com/players/127

Pittsburgh--the City of Champions!

Pittsburgh Steelers-- won the Super Bowl
Pittsburgh Penguins--won the Stanley Cup
and.......
Judi lost 100 pounds!


Thoughts for today.....

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.
George S. Patton

Champions are made from something they have deep inside them: A desire, a dream, a vision.
Carl Lewis

Winning is 90% inspiration and 10% perspiration
I don't know who said this

and

Now the work really begins.....
Judi

There's a big difference for us moms.....

between the kindergarten picnic and the senior picnic.......

One was all about our children.
The other was all about us.

The conversations were all so different then.
The conversations are all so different now.

We've grown up.

Then.... we talked about play dates and enrichment programs.
Now....we're talking about ballroom dancing and Sunday night dinners.
Then....we discussed after school care.
Now....we are discussing empty nesting.
Then...we gave them wings.
Now....we set them free.

I'm not sure how I feel about it all. But, somewhere deep inside of me, beyond the tears and the fears, I'm getting a little bit excited.
Don't tell anyone but I think I might like figuring it all out.
Mum's the word.....

Pomp and Circumstance......

Tears and memories.
Commencement Day.
Here in Judiland.